Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri looks around her and sees so many people in pain. Everybody has their own journey. All journeys involve joy, sadness, comfort and fear. It may be cancer, a disability, Alzheimer's or other Dementia's and so many other diseases. People are plucked from this earth daily. So if it true that we all have a journey, then what is the purpose of all this? Sheri has learned that for her, the purpose is to learn "faith". Faith is "believing that God is who He says He is, and that He will do what He says He is going to do, even when you can not see the result of that faith".
So Sheri is trying to look at her journey with Bob and "Al" and have faith that this is Gods plan for her. One day at time, one moment at a time. It is a struggle, there are no easy answers. She is lonely and her life is not what she expected. But her life is what God expected. :)

Hebrews
1 Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. 2 This is what the ancients were commended for.
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Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri does not understand the one size fits all, medical treatment plans. Bob has had multiple severe back injuries over the years, mostly Sheri believes because of this inability to connect brain to pain. Pain increases an Alzheimer victims confusion and memory issues, not to even mention the increased possibility of falls. How can they say that this cognitively impaired person needs to have been in this pain for 6 weeks, and have had 6 weeks of physical therapy before he can receive a steroid injection in his back? As it turns out they did the injection, but now after the fact have said it my not be covered, because of not having met these guidelines? Alzheimer's does not have a one size fits all anything, other than the fact it is terminal and there is no cure. Lets get real people.

Living with Bob and "Al"

There are so many subtle changes in Bob. Even things that are important to him like choir at "work" (code for Adult Day Center), or outings are fleeting moments now. Sheri is trying hard to just live each day just in the moment, and know that"Al" enjoys things, in the moment. But this is hard, and sometimes it feels impossible to remember that God is in control and that she may never understand why she is on this journey. Sheri's heart hurts.

Second Corinthians 16
16 So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri woke this morning with an unusual amount of anxiety. She knows this has no purpose, and Bob and "Al" will surely sense it,  but she just can't seem to shake it. Of course drinking as much coffee as she does is probably not going help the situation now is it?  

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri is listening to the birds sing this morning, while Bob and "Al" groan in their sleep from the pain of their back. A sharp contrast between beauty and despair.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri took Bob and "Al" out to take some pictures this weekend. They both enjoyed it a great deal. Somewhere along the way Bob moved the wrong way and his back is worse than it has been in very, very long time. The kind of bad that leaves him unable to get comfortable with sharp jabs of pain on going in his lower back, which cause him to jerk in extreme pain. Sheri feels terrible. She knows it is not her fault but she feels bad that she can not keep him safe.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri tries not to look further ahead than today, she has many cyber friends much further along on this  journey. The one thing she has learned from them is no matter how bad we think things are now, with this disease   we know that that next phase will be worse. So living in the moment seems like a good choice.


Matthew 6:34 - Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Thoughts inside my head


I'm tired , I'm lonely
there is no place to hide
I look for the love we had
behind the shadow in your eyes

I try to be patience, I try to be kind
I try not to be angry, I try not to lie

I try not to remember, the you and me that we were
I try to hold back, not let the memories stir

Yet I want what we had
I want life as it was
I want you to be better
and I want to feel loved

I want to scream from the rooftops
life seems so unfair
for in this moment right now
it seems nobody cares

But instead I will sit quietly
watching you sleep
Because I'm not sure if tomorrow
 you'll be mine to keep.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Well as much as Bob likes helping Sheri clean up the kitchen, she thinks she may need eyes in the back of her head from now on. For several days Sheri has been trying to track down shall we say a rather unpleasant smell in the kitchen. Daughter number one ( the one who wears her heart on her sleeve) was able to spend some time and help her with the hunt. After pin pointing the general area in her very tiny kitchen, Sheri was surprised to find several items that say "refrigerate after opening" that "Al" had tucked neatly in the back of the cabinet. The items now had giant furry moss (you know the kind) covering the lid and the smell well... anyway Sheri is going to have to figure out a new strategy for letting Bob and "Al" help because she can't find anyone willing to put eyes in the back of her head and so far she has had to eliminate doing dishes and putting things away.  :)

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri recovered from her pity party from yesterday. It only takes a brief view of the news or a look around her small group bile study to see the faces of others in pain. She will keep her head held high and her heart full of thanks and gratitude.


Proverbs 31:30
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.” (NLT)

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri is remembering a time when in effort to help their niece visit her recently deceased mother's grave, Sheri and Bob went to the cemetery to shovel the snow off of the flat grave stone. Because it was a fairly new stone Sheri and Bob could not find it in the cemetery and being winter in the frozen tundra, there was a good 1 and 1/2 feet of snow blanketing the cemetery.Their niece was coming from down south and they knew she would not be able to find it either. Sheri and Bob knew how much it meant to their niece since she would be in town, so Bob began to shovel. They were certain they were in the right area, so one by one they began to uncover the other flat markers. Each time they were disappointed when it was not his sisters name. Soon both Sheri and Bob began to shovel, each time Bob would look up and with much conviction, try to determine how close it might be, and each time Bob was convinced that the next one was for sure it. They eventually found it and by that time they were exhausted and so happy their niece would be able to visit her mothers grave that the somberness of what they were doing soon gave way to an outburst of laughter because much time had past, and it was getting dark. As they stood and looked around, the hours of shoveling had resulted in an almost entire section of the cemetery being cleared of snow. As they embraced each other in tears of happiness they looked up to see the small gathering of people that lived in the house next door to the cemetery gathered in their window observing them.... embarrassed, Sheri and Bob quietly gathered their shovels and got in their car and went home. One of Sheri's favorite memories :)

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri never thought that when she wrote the article for "The Caregiver's Voice"  that she would be honored by family and friends the way that she has been. Sheri feels very, very, fortunate to have  people in her life that were willing to express how they feel about Sheri and her family. Below is a link to the "Caregiver of the Month with a Heart of Gold" award that Sheri received today. She hesitates to even put this on her blog, because she knows there are even more deserving caregivers then herself. So she is sharing it in the spirit of all caregivers everywhere particularly Ginny Carlson who just recently lost her husband John to Alzheimer's. She was a humble caregiver to him for many years and a wonderful mentor. If you are a caregiver reading this and care to share your first name and location with Sheri, post a comment with that info so the world can know you are out there, Sheri is sharing the spirit of this award with you, from her heart.

http://www.thecaregiversvoice.com/latest-news/tcvs-caregiver-of-the-month-sheri-zschocher

Sheri also wants to thank Brenda and her team at "The Caregiver's Voice" for putting all this together and for taking the time to hear our voices. Another big thank you to author Robin Lee Hatcher for her collaboration  on this contest. This is really such an honor.

Living with Bob and "Al"

March 18th, 1989
Happy 23rd Anniversary!
The song "One Moment in Time" By Whitney Houston was our Wedding Song. One day at a time is all we are promised. "Al" does not remember but Sheri does.



"So don't be anxious about tomorrow. God will take care of your tomorrow too. Live one day at a time."  Matthew 6:34

Living with Bob and "Al'

Sheri sat side by side Bob at his annual assessment yesterday March 13th. When his case worker asked if Bob knew what month it was "Al" replied "January". So Sheri guesses she won't be surprised when Bob does not realize their 23rd wedding anniversary is this weekend.   

Proverbs 12:4
A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri is not sure what is going on but Bob and "Al" slept until 3in the afternoon yesterday, and even then Sheri had to wake "them" up. Bob is in a lot of pain with his back maybe that is it. But the way it looks now church is not gonna happen this morning.  :(
Sheri hates this disease.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Well Sheri stepped way out of her comfort zone today! Below is a link to an article that Sheri wrote for a web site called The Caregivers Voice. The web site offers a wealth of knowledge and support to people like Sheri caregivers.
Sheri is sharing in hopes of helping someone else who might feel like they are alone on this journey, feel free to share it with others if you would like.  :) 

http://www.thecaregiversvoice.com/latest-news/the-many-shadows-of-alzheimers/

Living with Bob and "Al"

God is fulfilling promises, Bob hugged Sheri yesterday...all by himself.
A rare and precious moment indeed.


."with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love,"
Ephesians 4:2 NASB

Living with Bob and "Al"

Please look for the link below on the right side of Sheri's screen under the followers section, and watch this heart felt video of another Alzheimer's experience.

http://hidingfromtherain.com/

 linked with permission from Richard Roman

Livng with Bob and "Al"

Sheri tells her story to the unknown each day, but thankful someone is listening to what she has to say. She draws strength and courage from the comments you share, because maybe your burden is to much to bear. Maybe like Sheri this day makes you feel sad, hearts, hugs and kisses...(she may cry, just a tad) But she will remember that God's love kisses her life,  His heart keeps her focused and His arms hold her tight.


Psalm 63:3 Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri is learning to enjoy life, just the way it is. She is trying not to focus on the future, but to live today as if were the last. She is going to continue to get Bob and "Al" out and about as much as she can, while she still can. She is not saying life is hunky dory, She is just trying not to wallow in the Alzheimer sadness. (well, at least not until tomorrow)