Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri has been trying hard to get out with her camera and commune with nature in hopes of getting some relief from the feelings she is having. She knows that is probably unrealistic, but it is hard to work and have these overwhelming feelings sitting on her heart. and it is apparently even harder to keep them from seeping out the corner of her eyes.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri is trying hard to look at life through a new lens, her camera is helping her do that.

God is good.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri knew one thing she would struggle with would be giving up control of Bob's everyday mental stimulation needs , and as expected she is struggling greatly. She realizes there is no way for the care center to provide the type of interaction Sheri was providing... but it seems like there is not much stimulation at all. Sheri's heart hurts about this, because she can see the decline each week.
She is not sure what she is holding on to, but it is fading in "the boys" quickly.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri went to see the boys this weekend. She really needed what she remembered to be a close , strong hug. What she received was a stiff distant tap on the back. Touch has not been given a high enough rating in the form of survival needs, in Sheri's opinion.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Daughters one and two went to see "the boys" for Fathers Day. Bob told the girls he was sorry he had not kept in touch. :(
Sheri believes "Al" thought the girls were Bob's sisters.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri has been trying to go see "the boys" in the morning because they seem happier then. When she got there yesterday "Al" was sitting at the dinning room table. The aids had give him his duplo blocks and his coloring project. The aids mentioned Bob had made friends with one particular man that is wheel chair bound and can not really speak, and his hands shake terribly. So the two of them were together at the table enjoying coffee .The aids realized the gentleman that can barely speak was also trying very hard to build with the blocks which was wonderful. As the aids were getting breakfast ready they explained to "Al" that we needed to clean up the blocks to make room for the food, so Sheri started to help put them away. The sweet gentleman tried to help as well and started to put his hand in Bob's coffee cup. Sheri started to stop him when she realized the sweet man may be a little more with it than "Al" as he retrieved a very wet duplo block from "Al's coffee cup. :)

Living with Bob and "Al"

 Sheri feels like she is just "going through the motions" right now, and she thinks she maybe there a while.
Psalm 40:1-2 I waited patiently for the LORD to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri can not keep him safe, Sheri can not keep him safe, Sheri can not keep him safe, Sheri can not keep him safe, Sheri can not keep him safe, Sheri can not keep him safe.......

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri is glad to see it is not her stressful life that causes her to forget to check Bob's pockets for randomness. She received a sweet but somewhat frantic email from the Adult Day Center yesterday . The wonderful person who does Bob's shower, puts his shirt and tee shirt in the dryer so it will be warm for him when when he gets out of the shower. (how incredibly wonderful is that? Talk about the royal treatment) Well, it was shower day and she popped them in the dryer not realizing  "Al" had stashed some crayons in his shirt pocket and ... yep melted crayon on his shirts! Too funny! Because Sheri had just done that last week! Sheri was more worried about the Adult Day Centers dryer than Bob's shirts... cause she is still trying to get the wax out of her dryer at home :)
Sheri just loves the staff at Open Circle, they are wonderful. Thank you for all you do.

Living with Bob and "Al"

There have been many difficult changes in "Al" and Sheri has moved her line in the sand many times, but she has been looking at different options for placement. She has been trying to take a logical approach, but honestly there are no good choices here. That is not to say there are not good places, she just means that no one should ever have to make a decision between self preservation and  knowing a choice you make will bring about a substantial decline in a loved ones life. Sheri is trying to be honest about her feelings. She knows others must be struggling with this as well. She hears over and over from her readers that they appreciate feeling connected with her on this journey, so Sheri is going to continue to share this process here. Please know she is not asking for pity about the situation she knows it is what it is. Her emotions are raw right now and she is human. As hard as it is she will continue to Pause, Praise and Pray.

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri had to cancel the "boys" evening ride home on the bus. Things just were not working out at all. Sheri picked him up at "work" (code for Adult Day Center) yesterday, once in the car Bob had no idea who Sheri was and was mumbling something about being late under his breath, and trying to give her directions. Sheri thinks  "Al" has added bus driver to Sheri's resume :)

Living with Bob and "Al"

All Sheri can say is it is going to be very,very, long day. "Al" decided sleep was not in his plan last night and he kept Bob and Sheri up all night... and Sheri means all night. "Al" was quite paranoid about the possibility of some one stealing his cane and actually brought into their all crowded bed. Sheri either needs a new plan or bigger bed.