This blog is about life with my husband who was diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer's and Frontal Lobe Dementia in 2008. He was 64 at the time although now, knowing more about the disease, Alzheimer's was present many, many years ago, which is why early detection is so important. As you read the blog the character "Al" that I created in 2008, represents the way that Alzheimer's is invading our daily lives.
There is an archive tab further down the page that starts from the beginning of our journey.

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Living with Bob and "Al"

Sheri is starting to understand that she has an underlying feeling that Bob has abandon her. After all Bob took the same vows as she did. The problem with this type of abandonment is that there is no affair to blame, no "we just grew apart" or "I just don't love you anymore." The abandonment can't be discussed on Dr. Phil or Oprah. Bob is just gone. He has been replaced by "Al" and neither Bob nor Sheri get to have any say in the matter. She knows it is not his fault, it is what it is, but these feelings leave an Alzheimer spouse with waves of emotions that hover over their heart, but have no way to wash ashore.

Psalm 34:18 

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit
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3 comments:

  1. MariaroseJanuary 9, 2014 at 8:44 AM

    Oh Sheri oh dear. From a care-giver daughter's point of view, I was always amazed how dementia had made Mom self-centered, she could no longer connect outside of her self, she had lost her empathy.
    There is a saying, "I remember you when you were just a twinkle in your daddy's eye". Dementia has stolen that twinkle from both of them.

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  2. MarcheJanuary 9, 2014 at 4:15 PM

    Well said, Sherri.
    There is no explanation or scapegoat for the emotions we experience other than the bland phrase: "It's the disease."

    ReplyDelete
  3. Rita217GJanuary 9, 2014 at 6:16 PM

    My heart is empty, no love to give out or to receive. I am sad and lonely with a spouse sleeping in the other room unaware of my needs.

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